Random Ranting: More Books

Finished Brideshead Revisited
Last Chapter reminded my of certain time that makes me sad whenever I think about it
Started Extremely Loud, and Incredibly Close
Read One Chapter
Wanted to Cry
I think I'm going to read this one only when I am alone.
I think it'll be one of those books that is followed by depression, like The Virgin Suicides, so watch out because I might delete my facebook.

Maybe I was depressed during winter break because I read of Mice and Men, nah it was probably the fact that I hadn't seen nano in weeks and I missed my mom, it's during those times when you really notice how my mom was like a magnet. When she was around everyone always made an effort to spend the holidays and birthdays together, but now everyone goes their own way. On my birthday I am like a stray cat being taken in by different families, it might sound nice, but it isn't. All you really want is your family, they don't ask questions. Now I want to be alone , I hate my birthday so much because I hate being the center of attention, and I hate being asked all these questions I don't want to answer.

Maybe I was depressed to summer vacation because I read Franny and Zooey, and The Picture of Dorian Gray. The characters are stuck, in a way, and I felt that too, I even had a nervous breakdown, I even prayed for God to take away my feelings of being stuck, I asked him to guide me, to show me the way to a fulfilling life. I still haven't been "enlightened," but maybe soon, you have to make things work too, and put some effort into it, but I don't want to. Life isn't about magic tricks, if you ask for something it's not going to appear instantly. It takes time. I'm pretty sure that it wasn't depression though, I had a lot of chocolate that day, and maybe I was just crashing.

I'm not feeling depressed though, I'm just reminiscing. Fun times. I'm being serious. There's something fun about moping around all day, I mean I hate it so much when I do, but then once I'm all better all I want to do is go back.

Oh summertime, how I miss you, your weather may suck, but you provide me with so much time to think and bring myself down.

I don't think I'll ever be satisfied. I think I'll always be "stuck." Oh dear.

I'm crazy.

Random though of the day

If I were a boy I'd be awesome at football so I could get into whatever school I wanted to, and then I'd become super popular, and everyone would love me, and I'd get all the hot girls, and I wouldn't have to study so much, because the school would love me so much for my awesome skillz, plus I'd be too busy being super awesome at football. yes. Plus, I would be tall.

Not true, I'd probably be like a skater or something, even though I greatly dislike kidz on skateboardz. Or I'd be in a band. I'd be the bass player.

Sorry for the z's. I should be manufacturing z's, but unfortunately I procrastinate way too much. Listening to Robyn and writing this.

I love Alexander Perchov. He's the best ficitonal character ever, for reals. If I were a boy I'd be him. Think I want to buy Gogol Bordello's album, not really. Eugen Hutz is exactly what I imagined Alexander Perchov to look and sound like. Now I'm listening to Kylie. Gonna read Everything is Illuminated again. so good. Been reading too much Hipster Runoff. I should stop so I could manufacture z's ASAP.

Edit:
Note to self: Bohoo! Sleeping is for the weekend, and so is Lost, and life. Deal with it.

Random Story of the day, because I'm bored and procrastinating hardcore

Today when I got home from the doctor I was watching Bored to Death, and this girl, who happened to be high via smoking a joint, said something, and I thought "that sounds like something I would say". Oh no. lol.

Another story.
This one time when I was taking a nap, U-2 came on my ipod, and I jumped out of bed, I couldn't go back to sleep. Yes, that is a scary song.

Pain

So today I had another "mini-surgery," as my sister calls it. For some reason, I am in much more pain this time around. Gah seriously I could stab someone that's how much pain I'm in, can't wait till eight so I can take more pills, because the pain's starting to come back. grrr. The pain was so bad I could not even watch Lost, I love Lost, and this was episode one of season two.Which means: Desmond! :( Dang doctor didn't give me enough anesthesia today.

Okay so onto other more important things. The new Cheryl Cole single premiered today. I stayed up till one in the morning just so I could hear it. It was so worth it though, "Promise This" is brilliant. All day long I've had the french bit stuck in my head. "Alouette outte outte d'eployer l'aile" over and over. Wish I had my ipod.

It hurts! So yeah here's some Hurts.



Tear Tear. I love it how their music is so emotional it's funny kind of.

old gregg

Old Gregg, I will always love you.